Burning Man encounters
Last year was my first Burning Man experience. I married myself and shared my story with everyone I met. This year’s path of entrepreneurship, and subsequently always talking about what I do, had exhausted me. I felt more drawn to listening deeply to others’ stories, knowing that in their words and experiences lie clues that would guide me on the next part of my journey.
The personalities I profiled, portray the diversity of Burning Man goers, and the variety of their intentions, especially during a time where many are generalizing and making opinionated conclusions about the festival’s intentions.
[For anonymity reasons, I made up names for the characters, names that I felt described them in the absence of photos.]
Big Linda & Sweet Joe
Time: 7 PM during dust storm
Location: Some camp’s dome
“How did you and sweet Joe meet?” — Me
“I had only had sex with my ex husband who cheated on me and left me with 2 kids. After both of them had graduated high school, I decided it is time for me to start enjoying life, if you know what I mean,” she winked. “While I am not a computer person, I figured how to go on Yahoo and enter “sex in Seattle.”
“I clicked on the first couple of links, and an online dating site came on top. I uploaded a photo, a short description and forgot about it. Then this handsome white man started writing me, saying I have a nice smile. Me nice smile, since when? I don’t remember any man complementing me. After 3 attempts, I agreed to meet with him for wine. I arrived to the bar to make sure he was real, and was not using a fake photo. And oh my god he looked stunning. So I ran back home, changed my clothes, put on some make-up. You know I was in my jogging clothes.” — Big Linda
Sweet Joe: “As soon as I saw her photo on the website, I said to myself that smile is full of love and goodness, I must meet her. When she was over 40 minutes late, something inside me told me to still wait.”
Big Linda “and it was history since then. My sex life exploded. You know we are swingers.”
Me: “You mean you dance swing? I love swing!”
Big Linda: “No honey, the other kind of swinging. We sleep with other couples.”
Me: “Oh of course. Wow. Tell me about a fun experience you two had swinging.”
Sweet Joe: “ oh so many! but one of my favorite, is when the man went down on Big Linda and the woman went down on me and we were in the same bed high-fiving each other.”
Me: “you two are killing it ;)”
The Early Employee
Time: 10 AM
Location: A morning dance party
“what do you do?” — Early employee asked me
“oh don’t want to talk about that, but you tell me.” —Me
“I work at ____ (fill in the blank big fast growing startup in SF), you know I have been there for 4 years now. I don’t think I will ever make that big of an impact, like touch millions of lives, like I do now.”
“Well it depends on how you define impact. You can make a bigger difference too in one conversation 1 on 1.” — Me
“Yeah I agree, and honestly I have been thinking of leaving the company, but I ran into the head of Engineering, and we were both on acid and he told me to come work for him at the company’s new operation in NYC. So that is very enticing and I am looking to do it.” — Early employee
“Haha so you are getting a new position offered at Burning Man? That is so unexpected.” — Me
“I mean Burning Man is like San Francisco but on acid.” — Early employee
Castro Lovers
Time: midnight
Location: An art car
“Where are you from?” — me
“San Francisco, I live in the castro” — Castro Lover
“What happened to your friend’s arm?” — me
“Oh you mean my boyfriend! He fell from an art car, so we took him to the Burning Man hospital, and within an hour they had his arm scanned and it turned out it was broken. They took the best care of him.”
“Sounds better and faster than the real care system. How did you two meet?” — me
“I was going through a difficult break up that shattered my soul. I had no expectations to be in a relationship anytime soon. I went to a bar with some friends and saw this cute red headed young man sitting alone. I smiled at him so he came to me. A couple of days later we moved in together.” — Castro Lover
“Are you two in love?” — me
“Very. He’s here from London and I am helping him find a job. I took a year off work and enjoying our time together. It is his first time at Burning Man. It was his dream to go, but he was worried about expenses and finding a ticket. It is my 10th. It all worked out, and here we are.”
“Can you kiss each other?” — me
“Of course” — Castro Lover
… and a long passionate, delicious kiss followed.
Beautiful Cat
Time: Sunrise
Location: biking in the middle of the desert
“Who are you here with?” — me
“Initially with a camp I applied to join, but after day 1 of Burning Man, it has been with my mom.” — Beautiful Cat
“No way, your mom made it. Tell more more. Wish I could kidnap my mom and drop her at Burning Man.” — me
“Yeah I was shocked myself. She and her minister friend decided last minute to come and see what it is all about. I think she may be lost and trying to find her way.” — Beautiful Cat
“What does she think of it so far?” — me
“She lost herself into working at my camp. Cooking and taking care of everyone. You know the biggest upside of having my mom here is that I never have to worry about being hungry.” — Beautiful Cat
“I would love to meet her.” — me
“Well come with me and you shall meet her.” — Beautiful Cat
And I did. She was extremely loving and caring.
The Viking
Time: Sunrise
Location: Near a music camp
“You have an accent. Where are you from?” — me
“Amsterdam.” — The Viking
“What made you come all the way?” — me
“I happened to be in California during last year’s burning man, so I thought why not check out the festival. I met a group of amazing people from Tahoe and they took me into their camp. I came back for them, they have become family. And it is our yearly reunion.” — The Viking
“I take it you will be here next year too.” — me
“Of course, and every year until I die.”
Dumb and Dumber
“Oh hey girls looking good.” — Dumb
“Why thank you, where you guys from?” — me
“Reno dude. and you?” — Dumber
“San Francisco. Is that your first burn?” — me
“Hell no. Our 4th. You know this is our scene, my sister’s boyfriend has an awesome art car, his family provides the wood for the burning man, like we are killing it here. Wait let me see your body. Damn you look hot, ok we want to hang out with you.” — Dumb
“Way to objectify me.” — me
“oh come on dude. You know, I am a personal trainer and dig that shit. Like a nice body says a lot about your personality. Why don’t you come to our RV, have some coco and scotch?”
“Maybe next time, we have to go meet some friends.” — me
“Alright dude, see you later buddy!”
The Goddess
Time: 3 PM
Location: lounge of a healing camp
“Would you like some?” pointing at her veggie salad.
“Ah maybe. Are you sure?” — me
“Yes! First I don’t want to eat alone, second I know the craving for fresh vegetables is like in the desert” — The Goddess
We shared lunch under a massive tent, and we did not say much but exchanged smiles here and there. I fell asleep on a mattress near the floor.
She came by later, and asked me if I would like a massage. There was a no show at the camp’s spa. A certain lady named Rose was no where to be found. I said yes, of course. After getting my massage I could not find my beautiful goddess anywhere. I left her my lip balm that was rose flavored and wondered on.
Marina girl & hoboboy
Time: 10 PM
Location: Dinner table at a camp
“How did you two meet?” — me
“Last year at Burning Man he was camping alone. I invited him to stay in my camp and we started hanging out in San Francisco.” — Marina Girl
“One night we went out partying and took the wrong bag of drugs, and we thought it was molly but it was Ketamine; I was throwing up and she could not move. That night we really bonded you know?” — Hoboboy
“Oh yeah I can see that.” — me
“And he is so sweet, we are just friends, but we love to hang out and have fun together. Are you cold by the way?” — Marina Girl
“Yes freezing actually.” — me
“Come let me give you some leggings, and a sweater but you must return them.” — Marina Girl
“Ok I will take you up on it.” — me
Marina girl disappeared shortly after.
The good lawyer
Time: 7 PM
Location: Hiding from the dust storm somewhere
“Why did you decide to be a lawyer?” — me
“I want to change the world. Since I realized that is what I want to do with my life, everything became clear. I worked hard focusing on that one mission and opportunities began dropping on my lap.” — The good lawyer
“Like what?”
“I got this job as an environmental lawyer at a non profit to fight the big companies in San Francisco my dream city. SO I moved from San Diego. Found an apartment in a week and now I have a new group of friends who I came with. I had to work hard and have a good intention for the world and everything worked out.” — The good lawyer
“How do you like burning man?” — me
“I love it, I get to party really hard, sometimes too hard and pass out. But you know I also work hard in the real life. I feel like I deserve it.” — The good lawyer
The friendly neighbor
Time: 4 PM
Where: Spanking Camp
“Where are you from?” — me
“Israel and you?” — The friendly neighbor
“Lebanon, uh oh.”
“I am so sorry about the 2006 war… and everything after.” — The friendly neighbor
“You should be, haha but us the people it is not our fault.” — me
“Yes, I love people from Lebanon we are so similar, food, traditions, culture, nightlife. But having said that, I do deserve a spank for the war. Would you spank me?” — The friendly neighbor
“Alright there is a free station, lets go there, and let me get the paddle.”
Spanking starts: “one for the airport, one for the roads, one for the electricity…”
“Go harder please.” — The friendly neighbor
“Wait this is not a punishment is it? you seem to be enjoying it :)” — me
